4 Steps to Find a Therapist that’s Right for YOU!
By Alyssa Quimby, MD
If you’ve been following our blog for awhile now, you know how much we LOVE therapy! I often say “Therapy is good for everyone” and I truly believe that. I think therapy can be especially beneficial when you go in with a specific issue you need help unpacking.
In my own life, I started therapy in college when I was struggling with an eating disorder. I went later with my partner before we got married for premarital counseling to talk about how we could best communicate, how to fight better, etc. We went again when I was pregnant with our first daughter. I also went when my mom passed away and I was really struggling with the grief of this. And EVERY time without fail – these sessions really have been life changing.
A therapist is nothing to be afraid of, nor does needing one indicate some inherent weakness in you or your partner. A therapist is a person who can be a more objective observer because they are not personally involved in your life. Therapists are great at guiding you through tough conversations or helping you see a different perspective. They can also ask questions no one else is asking (or you can’t hear from people who know you well).
So how do we go about finding a therapist that’s right for you? - which can be one of the main road blocks for people. You may assume this person will be too hard to find or you will have a hard time connecting with a stranger or that it will be too expensive. So here are some tips to make this process hopefully a bit easier!
Step 1 – Contact your Insurance Company
Many people have mental health coverage or therapy coverage through their insurance. It’s important to find out what your coverage is and which providers are “preferred” (ie, covered/less expensive) by your insurance company. Assuming you do have coverage, your insurance company should be able to give you a list of preferred providers. Once you get this list, look them up and come up with a list of 5 to 10 that seem like they may be the right fit (think about age, sex, location, area of specialty, if they offer telehealth or in person visits, etc). Once you’ve compiled your list, contact all the offices to schedule a consultation visit where you’ll be able to meet the therapist and see if it’s the right fit.
Step 2 – Contact HR through your Employer
You may be surprised to hear this, but many organizations offer what’s called an Employee Assistance Program (or EAP) which provides free therapy and counseling for employees and their families who are facing personal or work-related challenges. This means you can use this for just about anything – work stress but also challenges with your relationship, parenting issues, etc. Your employer will give you the contact info for the specific EAP they use and then from there, you’ll get a list of therapists who are available depending on your specific need. This is all completely confidential, so your employer will have no idea why you’re using the services. This is actually how I’ve found several of my therapists and have had great experiences this way.
Step 3 – Get referrals from your friends or doctor
If you run into roadblocks finding a therapist through step 1 or 2 – ie, you don’t have coverage or an EAP program. Or, even if you do, you can’t find a therapist through these means that works for you for whatever reason, then move on to step 3. Ask your friends or your doctor for specific recommendations. Many people go to therapy so you may be surprised how many of your friends have great recommendations in this area. I’m also asked all the time by patients for recommendations for therapists (especially surrounding postpartum depression or stress related to fertility) so I have a list of people my patient’s have had good experiences with that I happily share. For many people, getting a personal recommendation helps them to feel more connected with this therapist right off the bat – knowing they are recommended by someone you know and trust.
Step 4 – Go Online!
If steps 1-3 don’t work for you and you find therapy is just too cost prohibitive, checking out some of the online platforms for therapy can also be a great option. Many of these are not covered by insurance but rates are quite reasonable (from $65 to 100 per week).
Check out this link to some of the best online therapy sites to get an idea of what’s out there!
Ok…I hope this leaves you armed with lots of resources to help you find the therapist that’s right for you. And if you’re someone who’s been thinking about therapy for a while – take this as your sign that it’s time to finally do something about it!
